u2october's Diaryland Diary


No Cuckold Therapy

It's a little after 1am, and I am in Ryan's room(thanks for letting me use it occasionally while you're on the road) because Dan is sleeping over. This wouldn't be so bad if they could keep it down. I'm a pretty laid back guy when it comes to being poly, but I've discovered that I'm definitely not into the cuckold thing and prefer not to have to listen to whatever the fuck that was.

I'm on week 4 of therapy. My highlight of my last session was that my therapist believes that my deep depression is actually my place of comfort and that I subconsciously fight any feelings of happiness. I responded that it isn't subconscious, it's on purpose. That's when we talked about how it felt as a kid when the church trotted is out as their charity case, and how that might be why I resent it so much when people try to make me happy - I don't trust their motives.


At least I'm only paying 10 bucks a visit.

It appears the fucking is over for now. Maybe I'll try to get some sleep now.

:end transmission:

01:04 - 02.20.22


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