u2october's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Larry Norman is Driving a White Van After toying with it for several years, I have finally begun working on a book about my experiences growing up, specifically about the intersection of poverty and American evangelicalism. I'm calling it "The Jesus Caste" and I'm currently writing condensed versions of stories that I have catalogued. The way my brain works, this system works best to make sure I can arrange them in the order I prefer after writing the condensed versions, then I can expound and start doing re-writes. Here is my latest condensed chapter:
When I think about the entirety of my religious trauma, there are a few big moments that each serve as a trailhead from which countless other paths spring out in different directions. One of the most influential of these moments is an experience that I share with thousands of Gen-Xers and Millennials: viewing the four film series about the rapture. If you aren’t familiar with the rapture, it is a belief based on I Thessalonians 4:16-17: For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord. The belief that all Christians, whether living or dead, is widely held by evangelicals. Before Kirk Cameron made his rapture-themed movies based on the wildly popular book series by Jerry Jenkins and Tim Lahaye, there was the OG rapture series starring Patty Dunning: A Thief in the Night (1972), A Distant Thunder (1978), Image of the Beast (1981), and The Prodigal Planet (1983). It is impossible for me to understate the lasting negative effect these films have had on my life. While I had seen these films numerous times by the time I reached the 6th grade, this particular viewing is one that had a lasting impact because I had recently turned 12 years old. In evangelical Christianity, as with many religious traditions, the age of 12 is considered the age of accountability. In the tradition in which I was raised, it was the age when your sins can officially send you to hell. So when we started watching these four films in my 6th grade class it was terrifying. The first film, A Thief in the Night gave me lasting paranoia that my family would be raptured and I would be left behind to run from the authorities. This was exacerbated by the fact that the doctrine of the AG was that there is no degree of sin, and that your salvation is something that is so fluid that it can come and go on a daily basis. By that logic, if I told a white lie, or fought with my siblings and the rapture occurred, I could be left behind. After we watched the film, I didn’t sleep well for weeks. I spent the majority of my time constantly asking for forgiveness for any perceived sinful act, no matter how minute. I had nightmares of being chased by the white U.N.I.T.E. van that was driven by the police of the New World Order who were constantly roaming the streets looking for those who had not received the Mark of the Beast. I even wet the bed a few times because I was too scared to get up in the middle of the night to relieve myself. I still suffer from pretty severe paranoia, although medicine and therapy have helped lessen its effects a bit. It also ruined the Larry Norman Song You’ve Been Left Behind for me forever. :end transmission: 00:53 - 04.07.24 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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